Let's Build a Wall

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

The abortionist doctor with blood on his hands,

drug abusing guitarists and their hard rock bands,

inarticulate plumbers whose pants don’t fit,

and pit-bull hockey moms with their bright red lipstick.

Migrant workers who don’t speak American,

the clumsy and oafish appliance repairman,

the angry punk rocker with a tattooed lip,

the single mother with a baby on each hip.

Opera devotees who support PBS,

expensive, German, Freudian psychiatrists,

coalminers and their beautiful young daughters,

and all crooked slime-ball Illinois governors.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

Those oily pimple-face, teenaged comic book geeks,

lonely, suicidal, train-riding circus freaks,

depressing, French, existentialist poets,

powerful African warlords with massive debts.

The homeless, unemployed, schizophrenic woman,

the doomsday prophet without a survival plan,

blushing, virginal brides dressed in fine white gowns,

back alley prostitutes on the wrong side of town.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

The compulsive gambler who can’t feed her kids,

and the NASCAR driver whose life is on the skids,

the transgendered, the homosexual, the lesbian,

and desperately out of work librarians.

Keep out all those criminals who live behind bars,

and the repo-man who’s come to take back my car,

dictators, premieres, and cowboy presidents,

and job stealing, wetback, illegal immigrants.

Baptists, Catholics, and Unitarians,

nursing homes full of grey octogenarians,

crazy people who love dogs instead of cats,

pacifist Amish and their ridiculous hats.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

Silicone and surgically augmented porn stars,

hot shot lawyers driving their gas guzzling foreign cars,

anyone who is slowly dying of AIDs

frustrated housewives yelling at Hispanic maids.

Small business owners who can’t pay back their loans,

the Hindu worshipping at a shrine made of bones,

the Canadians with their socialist ways,

and the dope smoking, pot-head who lives in a daze.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

Settled Jews and the displaced Palestinians,

liberal and revisionist historians,

those union members that are always on strike,

the lousy stand-up comedian at the mic.

The pastor at the pulpit in the church across town,

and the arsonist who burnt all those houses down,

heroin junkies in search of their next fix,

aging Swedish Lutherans with their lutefisk.

Syro-Phonecian mothers with dying children,

those unacceptable Samaritan women,

the swarming mass of illiterate peasants,

Roman centurions and their favored servants.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

Evolutionists who believe we’ve come from apes,

the man in the next county on trial for rape,

card carrying members of the NRA,

the father who won’t accept that his son is gay.

Those non-violent protesters who refuse to fight,

and on-the-go soccer moms who can’t sleep at night,

young people who shouldn’t complain, but still do,

sleazy Wall Street insiders and stock brokers too.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

Janitors, receptionists, doctors, and nurses,

tailors, and authors, and cooks, and men who drive hearses,

jury members who refuse to find “guilty,”

and grizzled old fishermen who harvest the sea.

Japanese investors calculating their Yen,

men in a mid-life crisis remembering when,

long-winded atheists who can’t explain why,

all those idiots voting for the other guy.

Young Somalians suspected of terrorism,

college professors who teach our kids Marxism,

over-paid athletes and their oversized egos,

actors, singers, and dancers from off Broadway shows.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.

Radical Muslims who despise our way of life,

Mormons in Utah who still have multiple wives,

government officials who don’t give a damn,

IRS agents collecting for Uncle Sam.

Please tell us Lord Jesus that we have done the right

to keep out all those people that you just don’t like;

the blacks and the Asians, Hispanics and Jews,

excepting, of course, Jews who say they love you.

Let’s build a wall to keep them out

all those folks we could just do without.