What I’m Reading: The Sacred Journey

I am not what I want to be.

I am not (yet) what I want to be.

The insertion of that three letter word changes everything. That simple three letter word changes the static to the dynamic.  That three letter word transforms the statement from despair into hope.

As I read Charles Foster’s book The Sacred Journey [i] I realized both meanings. 

I want to be holy.  I know that our Father in Heaven has clothed me with the holiness of his beloved and unique son, Jesus, but I am not worthy to wear those clothes. I want to be close to God.  I know that I could do nothing to get to him and that he has, nonetheless, drawn close to me, but I am not always – not often aware of his presence.

I am not what I want to be.

And this may be the existential quandary that has driven innumerable pilgrims of every faith tradition around the world and through the millennia of human history to begin a journey.

I am not (yet) what I want to be.

The implication of that inserted three letter word is that I can – at some point – arrive. If I begin I can move; I can travel. I can be transformed. And at the end of my travels I will arrive. 

We’ll sing in the morning the songs of salvation,
we’ll sing in the noontime the songs of his love,
and when we arrive at the end of our journey
we’ll sing the songs of Zion in the courts above. [ii]

Foster leads the reader through the stories of the Christian Scripture deftly illustrating that not all who wander are lost.[iii]  From Cain and Able through Jesus and the Apostles the bible is filled with travelers.  

A few weeks ago I asked the question “Why is Jesus always leaving?”  I asked it again a few days later in music.   Foster has an answer for that question. Why is Jesus always leaving? It’s because Jesus is the "God who walks."  He walks among us and with us and sometimes he leads us out into the wilderness, sometimes he leads us up to Jerusalem.  He began his teaching by inviting people to follow him as he walked.

And so I want to make a pilgrimage.  I want to wander.

And as I say that I immediately list all the reasons why that is altogether unfeasible:

            I have responsibilities here.
            I don’t have any vacation time left.
            What about my family?

            Where would I go?  It’s not as if there are any “holy places” or shrines in southern
                        Minnesota.

I know… I know… if it’s really important to me I’ll find a way and everything else is just an excuse. But the questions and the doubt (and the fear) remain.

Foster’s book has got me all stirred up, and I’m not exactly happy about that. If I allow myself to rest in my comfortable sedentary life-as-I-now-know-it I will not know the mystery and wonder of the journey. I will stay, pretty much, as I am.  But having read the book I am compelled to do something with it.  Now that I have heard the word I must heed what it says or I will be one of those double minded fools… I will begin to forget the reflection of myself that I have seen in this book.

I will have to think about this for a while.  A pilgrimage is not just a walk down the road on a sunny afternoon.  And it is not at all a tourist’s vacation.  I will continue to ponder the challenge of this book.  The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.  And, if I am to avoid the curse of Gnosticism[iv], I must incarnate this desire and put my flesh on the road. I cannot think about it for too long. I must get up and go.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” 

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[i] Foster, Charles, The Sacred Journey, Thomas Nelson Inc, Nashville TN, 2010.

This book is part of the Ancient Practices Series edited by Phyllis Tickle.

[ii] Salvation Army Composer – William Gordon “Salvation’s Song” 

[iii]  J.R.R. Tolkien

[iv] “Physical pilgrimage involves bodies, blisters, hunger and diarrhea.  …It is accordingly one of the best prophylactics against, and cures for, one of the deadliest and most prevalent disease crippling the church: Gnosticism.”  page xvi