Trying to Lose

In recent months I have been trying to lose arguments.  It’s a bit like that scene in the movie Fight Club when Tyler Durden tells everyone that their homework is to pick a fight with a complete stranger – and then to lose – except that I’m not really going out of my way to start fights or arguments.  I’m just trying to lose them.  It doesn't happen often, but every now and then something that I post on my blog or a comment that I make on the Facebook, or a link that I share riles up some of my friends  and, there you go, instant debate, ready-made argument.

But I've tried to make it my personal policy to not have the last word in these animated discussions – even when I think I could make a cogent point or that I could correct someone’s mistake. I might respond once or twice, but instead of trying to make sure that I have the final (and therefore victorious) word) I try to let it go.  I try to lose.  I don’t want to be that guy who’s up all night because “someone on the internet is wrong.”

Admittedly, however, it doesn't always go as planned.  Sometimes, after I've left what will be my final response, no one else says anything more – and I’m stuck with the final word.  Or, sometimes, I forget myself and get more involved than I had intended.

But still.  I’m trying to lose.

It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarreling. – Proverbs 20: 3
(and, please understand, I am not calling my friends fools.  I am trying to avoid being the fool.)