A Letter to a Humanist Professor

Dear Professor,

While it is true that this is
a religious belief based, however tenuously, on faith
I must remind you that it will not be tolerated.
This is the moral chaos at the root of your
heterodox, metaphysical philosophy.

You will not be allowed to travel
a hundred thousand miles every year -
not without the video recording devices and cellular telephones
of prominent television and radio preachers
trained upon you – we are watching.
And we are waiting for you to answer our questions,
questions we have asked repeatedly.

This is supposed to be the home of the free
and a land of milk and honey
but you, sir, have plunged us all
into a revisionist nightmare;
using the mind controlling properties
of television and higher education
you have made the children of this world
wiser than the children of light,
and we are not pleased.

Sincerely,
Ellanjay Dobson