I Get the Weirdest Spam Mail, Sometimes

I get the weirdest spam mail, sometimes:

Good day, sir.

I am contacting you with a good faith and believing that you are going to assist me in a very important alchemical transaction. Please, do not think this email as one of the scam mails, for your assistance in this transaction could save the world.

There is a restive $85million dollars fund belonging to my late client, Muammar al-Gaddafi, Former president of Libya is unable to move forward.  The money is not, sadly, in currency cash. It remains in unconverted lead sheeting. 

And after his death all of his family members was arrested. I have shifted the sheeting to an escrow storage facility so that nobody will have access to them again. I want very much to fulfill my client’s final wishes: to convert the sheets into gold and invest the fund in your country. 

All I need from you is these two things.  First, your honesty and sincerity for you to tell me that you are not going to expose the fund and Second, your skill in such alchemical transformations.  My late client, Muammar al-Gaddafi, Former president of Libya, left detailed instructions, but I am unschooled and unable to make sense of them. 

For your kind assistance (and secrecy) in this matter I will give you 30% of the total plus expenses for your assistance in this transaction, please kindly get back to me and let me know the line of business where we can invest this money in your country send me your full name address and call phone number Reply me on this Email: XXXXXXXXXX@XXXX.com

Also. It appears that you have not paid for driving on a toll road.  The invoice has been sent repeatedly.  To view a copy of the court notice *click here*.  Please read it thoroughly.  If you cannot attend the hearing, the judge may hear the case in your absence.  I could be pleased to service your debt in this matter in the shortest time possible.  Opportunities like this NEVER arise, but observe for yourself this one isn't too good to be true!

Best Regards,
Mr. Mames Jambo

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