The F.B.I will not
return my phone calls; they don’t believe that my complaints have merit, so I
am keeping a record. Journaling each event so that 1-I don’t forget (I forget
things. Dr Sorensen says that writing them down will help.) And 2- so that
someone will believe me.
It started in
December.
December 18: The sound of bowling balls on the roof. I
heard them, even if no one else did. Dad said I was having another ‘episode’
and said that we’d have to talk to Doctor Sorensen about changing the dosage on
my prescriptions. But, and this is how I know he’s wrong, I haven’t been taking
the meds. So It can’t be the pills that
caused an auditory hallucination. Not this time. I heard bowling balls- as if
someone was playing a couple of frames on the roof.
December 27: Slight seismic disturbances occurring precisely
every 21 minutes. Minor quakes. Just
enough to rattle the pictures on the wall a little. One of mom’s ceramic figurines
fell off the mantle. But those things were creepy anyway, so no big deal.
December 29: The sky was really red this morning. What is it that they say about a red sky in the morning?
December 29: The sky was really red this morning. What is it that they say about a red sky in the morning?
January 4: The quakes are happening again. Stronger this time. And more frequently. I timed them; they’re every 17 minutes now. The dishes in the china cabinet have fallen. Mom’s pissed.
January 11: I spotted a helicopter following me home from
school.
January 24: Congressmen W. Dickens visited our school
this afternoon. Dad didn’t vote for him but I think mom did. He said that the
government needs volunteers for an intense secret laboratory program. The congressman, not Dad…. God! What would he
know about government programs? Dad, that is, not the congressman.
January 25:
Despite the protestations of my parents I have enlisted for the
Congressman’s secret program. More helicopters tailing me today. And the air
smelled strange – like grapefruit or glass cleaner… something weird.
January 39: Alright.anothr call. I should after happened
shortly. and prepared.
February 15: I think that my telephone calls are being
monitored. But by whom? The F.B.I. routinely monitors all communications made
by members of Congressman Dickens’ staff, but would they consider me to be a
part of the staff already? The program won’t begin for another 3 months. Or
could it be another agency?
February 16: Dickens has ordered me not to call his office.
We’re going radio silent. Incommunicado. Dark.
February 23: Ancillary turncoat brownbag lunches on the
grassy knoll. Six times seventeen is never home. Rainy days and factories
always leave me dry buttered toasted almond eyes. I have become what I am and
what you are or what I am inside.
March Tuesday: Shock type vibrations are being transmitted
at me from an unknown source. I suspect Mr. Maxfield at school. Could he be
hiding some sort of EMF generator / transmitter in the gym locker rooms?
April 1 da Fools. They’ll all get theirs. They will
Apl apple 35 Cannn open door door. Need hep. Peez helmee
This disease is so incredibly awful. My brother has it, as does my youngest son. I believe the thought distortions are demonic. Am loving your haiku.
ReplyDeleteI wasn't writing with any disease or illness in mind. But I do appreciate (at least to some small degree) the struggle that other face in dealing with mental illness. I hope I don't offend.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm glad that you are enjoying the haiku. They're proving to be a different sort of difficult for me.
Nah, not offended. But you nailed schizophrenia.
ReplyDelete