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Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Dr. Tarrec Addresses the Jade Helm 15 Theories

Regular readers of this blog will know that I have a penchant for the conspiracy theory and the kook.  Give me Atlantis, give me the lost continent of Mu, give me energy pyramids and the Knights Templar. In the words of the blessed saint Zeddemore, "If there's a steady paycheck in it, I'll believe anything you say."

So after hearing about the Jade Helm 15 military training exercises and the outrageous fear-mongering floating around Faux News and the paranoid Tea-Party corners of the interwebs, I decided to ask my friend, Dr. Tarrec, about it all.  Dr. Tarrec is my prime source of information in this sort of thing. He sent me the following response:

“Dear Jefrey,

In regard to your recent inquiry, I have to say that, for the most part, those who are spreading these stories about the Jade Helm 15 exercises are moonstruck and quite nonsensical.

However, one small part of their lunacy is grounded in reality: the tunnels under various Walmart stores are quite real.  I have even travelled through them, myself.  Gunsels paid by the Brotherhood of Games use them to smuggle large quantities of Aqua Vitae and Colcothar through hostile states.  But these tunnels are not new.  The Brotherhood of Games built them long ago, in the early years of the 19th century. 

Of course, with all the heightened scrutiny in the area, the Brotherhood of Games has, to use a phrase, gone underground, somewhat. 

By the way, did you receive the coded documents that I sent you?  I have been experimenting with a new hexafluorine based encryption device. 

Warmest regards to you and yours,
Dr. P. L. Tarrec

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