What Will You Say

It’s a song I wrote as I delivered mail this week. It’s brief, but it says all that I need it to say. 

It’s not much. Maybe nothing. 

Oh God, the Moon

 

I was awakened by the absence of thunder and lightning outside my window early this morning. We’ve had storms and rain and hail and wind and tornados all this summer. Why is this night different from all the others? 

Where are the assassins? Where are the volcanos? Where are the divorce lawyers and the derecho wind storms? Instead I have psychology and philosophy. Questions and ideas. 

I’m going to die. You’re going to die. We’re all going to die. And now I am awake and cannot sleep. 

 Breathe. Think thoughts. Ask questions. Am I full of shit? Oh god, the moon. The moon and the way love turns into hate. Passion sours, curdles and the moon turns.

Gotta’ Leave this Town

It’s another lo-fi living room recording of a song i wrote. I actually wrote this one while i was out delivering mail along my route back in February. I’ve finally gotten around to recording it. 

 

Do Not Look into the Abyss

 

Do not look into the abyss. 

What is this absurd absence ? 

The bridge between angels and man 

Stretching out over empty nothingness.

 Can you explain this reality? 

Tell me that you belong with me. 

All the secrets of the this life 

Hidden in a dark laboratory. 

Like a shadow growing on the wall 

You look large, I am so small. 

Can you hear me knocking on your door?

Why do you ignore me when I call? 

When the dead start rising from their graves 

Tell me again that Jesus saves. 

I’m tired of this life, 

You and all your vulgar displays.

Alone

 

Why did I choose tonight to turn so wide ?

Disappearing into the back of my mind

Everything is fine here except the fire 

Cold and all alone, sleepless and tired.

Dreaming symbols in the dark, lights in the sky 

This might be dangerous, I can’t close my eyes

I am not performing but watch me fall 

Still storm watching as I lose my calm 

Have I done enough or is there more?

I cannot predict what life has in store

If I fell and broke my arm, if I cracked my face 

If I could not sing this song would I be replaced?

Confucius Addresses the Modern American Political Landscape

 

I’ve been reading recently from The Sayings of Confucius (as translated by James R. Ware - 1955). Though never deified, Confucius has been revered, and still is today, as the “First Teacher” and “Sagest of the Sage.” We could learn from his teachings. 

 The following sayings seem especially relevant to our times. Those with ears to hear will understand. 

 From Chapter XIII 

 19 - Fan Hsii asked about Manhood-at-it’s-best. “At home be humble; at work be respectful; with others be loyal. Even among the barbarians you may not abandon these precepts.”

 23 - “Great Man is accommodating , but he is not one of the crowd. Petty Man is one of the crowd, but he is also a source of discord.” 

 26 - “Great Man is dignified but not proud. Petty Man is proud but not dignified.” 

 the ideal man, according to Confucius, is not defined by his social status, wealth, or power, but rather by his character and ethical behavior. His teachings also idealizes a strict patriarchy- but the truth of it is applicable to everyone regardless of gender.

Close the Door (What Happens Now?)

Less than an hour 

 Only a brief hesitation 

I can’t stay long

 In a house so full of frustration 

 Close the door. Nothing’s found 

 What happens now? 

 If I’ve delayed 

 Only a little, goodnight. 

What do you want? 

 I’m sorry most of the time. 

 Close the door. Walk away. 

 What happens now? 

 I open my eyes 

 On some bizarre dimension 

Watching the storms

 Of violent destruction 

 Close the door. Apologize. 

 What happens now?

It’s just a low-fi living room recording of a song I wrote. I flipped through my notebook and was surprised to realize that I’ve got about fifty songs that I’ve written in the past couple of years. Not quite sure what I should do with that.